Vegan Sm-eegan!

Taking me away from my meat, is like trying to put a tutu on a fully grown Bengal tiger: highly dangerous and senseless. Taking me away from a steaming bowl of pasta drowning in thick cream sauce with cheese, is like trying to squeeze yourself through a paper shredder: you wouldn't even go there. And telling me that I can't eat chocolate would be like having a wailing, snotty-nosed toddler on your lap in the midst of a temper tantrum: you can't imagine.

So when I found myself seriously contemplating becoming a vegan I was taken aback by my own resolve. Talk about self-inflicted pain!

It was rather chance that I happened to take out a certain book from the library which got me started.

Like a true geek, I had been dying to get my full library card for the library in town and when the time came I was able to increase my loans from 2 books to 30 at a time! So, naturally,I went on a rampage pulling out everything from 1000s of things to do with eggs to Harry Potter to essays by C.S.Lewis. I looked round every section as though I had all the time in the world to read. I thought of everything I needed, everything I had been meaning to read up on and as I browsed the 'health' section I stumbled on a book of particular interest.

I knew I wasn't an unhealthy eater but I knew how much I ate. I pulled out a book: "Eating Less: Say Goodbye to Overeating". I glanced at it. It made sense. I wasn't about to start a diet but I did need to know when enough food was enough. I had previously looked for solutions online. The only one I remember is one that I constantly use when I get a little craving. Apparently, if you switch your cravings from food to something else, you'll no longer feel the urge to eat but to do whatever you thought about. The example they gave was craving going to the cinema. I use it all the time, but the last time I saw anything at the cinema was in November and I don't even remember the time before that.

I thought this book was a blessing. Whatever knowledgeable doctor had written it had just the right idea for me and I wasn't about to let the opportunity slip through my fingers. I added it to the stack of books I was resting on my hip. Then next to it I saw another: "The 21-Day Weight Loss Kickstart Diet".

To be honest, I have no idea why I picked it up. I can only think that it was for the rainbow coloured font down the spine. Anything with the word 'diet' in I tend to steer clear of. The word, for me, shouts TEMPORARY WEIGHT LOSS ON A DIET OF RICE CAKES AND CELERY STICKS. Alright if you like that sort of thing, apart from the fact that you're more than likely to bounce back to your starting weight when you give up or turn back to your old guilty pleasures. Diets aren't for me.

Nevertheless, I was aware that I was still suffering the adverse effect of too many student nights out.

I began reading and soon found how, according to these studies, potentially dangerous too much meat, fish, eggs, cheese and dairy was for you. The statistics made me look at meat differently. I suddenly wasn't so keen.

I also was reminded of the fact that vegetarianism and veganism could put an end to world hunger.

So after much more reading and meal planning, I decided I should try it.  

Today is the 28th of April. The 28th of May celebrates world hunger day. So, to me, it seems right that between now and then I should attempt to go vegan as a personal challenge. I have a feeling that it'll be a struggle but, without a doubt, I'm going to try my hardest. (I've got it sorted. Quorn and tofu at the ready!)

Make a wish!!

My 19th this year was different for so many reasons and it gave me time to think: this time next year I'll be 20 - 2 decades old - and suddenly that seems a lot OLDER!! True: after your 20th, there's your 21st, but after that people only start celebrating the 'BIG 30', 'BIG 40', 'BIG 50' ... You get the picture. And that means one of 2 things. Either you savor each 10 year interval for fear of having to circle yourself into another age group on membership forms or you wait in anticipation until you can have a big party! And if it's the latter category; you'll spend your life looking forward, overlooking the present.

Each year, the night of the 7th of April sees me in my bed having been told by multiple family members that "this is the last night of being ..." It sees me dribbling, half-falling out of the bed and changing my pyjamas without being concious of it. 

But this year, I flew back home and watched the hands of the clock turn to my birthday as we passed over a country dashed with a million little lights. I was alone but surrounded with hundreds of other passengers. I was watching films, eating curry and finishing off the packet of 'family-sized' popcorn I'd bought with me which had been an addition to breakfast, my entire lunch and now midnight snack. 

As I took in these surroundings, I spotted an opportunity. Ever the analyst, I saw this scene - being on a plane, without a care, in anticipation with many people I'd never met - as a pointer. Some sort of marker for the year to come. 

This birthday was different. Maybe this year: my last year of being a teenager (the last time I could excuse stupidity for naivety) ought to be something more than a routine living of life. Maybe it should mark time for some changes. Trying something new. And with the marathon plaguing social media, TV and conversations, I suddenly felt a little like I hadn't achieved what I could have had I put my mind to it. 

So I'm drawing up a list, like a bucket list, of a few things I could do. Not every one can run a marathon and I 100% fit into that category - if it hurts, I generally can't do it. But a thought a couple of things that would be good for me. I don't know how useful completing the Harry Potter series will be but I thought I ought to do since I never have. But it'll be some sort of achievement. 

So hopefully, when I check back next year, I will have done something that put my teen years out with a bang. 

Give me all of you

The world works in mysterious ways. How a girl listening to a song can sync so beautifully with a scene she sees before her is absurd.

Yet, today, I was that girl. Sat in the remembrance garden once again on a suny Sunday eating orange segments and dribbling them down my pure white blouse. 

One of my favourite songs at the moment is "All of Me" by John Legend. The lyrics are so heart-warming. It's an absolutely beautiful song. 

There were 2 people crashed out in the sun on a park bench outside Marks and Spencer. Their dog joined them and slept silently at their feet. I couldn't quite work out if they might be homeless. The man, dressed in a thick coat, holding the lead of his staffie in one hand, was in the direct burn of the sun. His companion, a girl equally dressed (her coat being red) lay sprawled over his knee, half hanging off the bench. 

The man woke up as John Legend kicked in on my iPod. This man stroked his wife as John sung: "Give your all to me. I'll give my all to you."

Suddenly, in this perfect, inhuman harmony the song slotted perfectly into the scene. 

Maybe those 2 were homeless but they had a love that radiated out regardless. A love for one another that was perfect for John Legend's music video. It just shows that no matter what you've got, no matter what you haven't, no one is incapable of love. 

The Sun Has Got His Hat On!

The sun is shining, the weather is mild and my flowers are out!

I like a bargain as much as the next tight person and (get your purses ready) when I saw the £1 mini daffodil deal in Marks and Spencer, I just had to get them!

One thing I absolutely LOVE is growing things on my windowsill. Not mould or dust but plants and flowers. My windowsill at uni is no exception. It's actually been the place where I've been able to harvest my dream of having an inside allotment when I grow up. It's been home to some little crocuses, a basil plant and now my 'Tete a Tete' daffodils.

With each new addition, I get better at looking after the plants. I always over water them or leave them for days neglected. I push them against the window so that they wilt with the condensation from my hot shower. But, my daffodils are the best ones yet!

I've got 3 that have already flowered and 2 coming through. I don't know why but I find it so exciting! And if I'm this excited over some little flowers, what will I be like when I have kids?!